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From "'Look, An Asian!' The Politics of Racial Interpellation in the Wake of the Virginia Tech Shootings" by Sylvia Shin Huey Chong
Conservative pundit Patrick
Buchanan blamed the Immigration and Nationality Act of 1965 for causing
the Virginia Tech shootings by allowing “the greatest invasion in history”
of “tens of millions of strangers” into our national community, including
“this deranged young man who secretly hated us,” while former Klan
leader David Duke lashed out at multicultural education, claiming that
“anti-white racists” such as poet Nikki Giovanni, one of Cho’s professors
at Virginia Tech, had helped to incite his violent actions.
WHAT
THE
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| I noticed that recently, I haven't really blogged about how I've been doing at school. Well, I'm not doing as well as I hoped I was.
Fiction Writing - at first, I just passed this class off as one of those filler classes, even though I don't take any pass/no pass classes. When people started to really criticize my writing, I was like, okay, I should really try harder with writing my stories. and I really am trying. I emailed my tutor and TA and they both talked to me. my TA is like wtf did I get myself into because he's a first year MFA student from SDSU and he didn't know that grad school would be like this. i dunno if he's really helping me with my writing, but he's really chill and we've talked a lot so I'm pretty sure I'm on his good side. still, the people in my group who read my stories don't really like my writing. there's this one girl who does almost nothing but criticize and she has never said one good thing about my story. I feel really left out in this class because I'm not THAT into fiction, I just thought this would be an interesting class to take since I wanted to be a writer when I was in fifth grade, back when Mrs. Schaffer made us write stories like every week. Everyone complained but I loved the work she gave us. Now that the standards are high, I feel like my work isn't good enough. Everyone is always talking about how much they LOVE this author and whenever someone names an author, the whole class goes MMMM HMMMM and I'm like uhh who the eff is that. also, I didn't do that well on the midterm. I talked to my TA about it and he was like Oh it's cool you'll get an A still. I dunno.......sometimes I feel like he feigns his leniancy and then when the actual grades come in he'll be like "oh yeah your work didn't add up to an A after all..." I do pretty well on the quizzes, fortunately. Not the last quiz though. I effed that one up. but I mostly get A's on my quizzes.
Asian American Studies - ugh, this class is so hard but the material is really interesting. I've gone to my TA's office hours a couple of times and the first time, I stayed there for an hour because I was just so confused about some of the material. Sometimes I want to write about something but I'm not confident that what I'm writing about is accurate or reasonable. ok, by now you can probably tell that I'm not very confident in much of my work, including commentaries which are supposed to be from MY perspective, because I have a hard enough time backing up my points. so I did pretty well on the paper, higher than the average and I worked FREAKING HARD on it. Worst cramps ever and I still wrote an A- paper. Literally, I tried to take a two hour nap at 4AM and most of the time, I was rolling around in bed, wincing due to those cramps. Actual midterm...I didn't do as well as I wanted but I got above the average. I've been participating a lot more during section so I really hope that my participation grade will help. Okay so when you see Lucy participating in class, you'll KNOW that she is really getting into the material. Sometimes I like the material but I'm too afraid to participate because I don't have a good grasp on what we're learning. so yeah, I really like Asian American Studies! I just don't know if I'll do well...
Intro to Media - OMG I thought this class wasn't supposed to be hard BUT IT IS!!!!!! It takes a LOT of work in class and outside of class. and everyone is super theoretical so I'm just like WTF why are you reading into the material so much???????? But that's UCSD, everything is so theory-based, by the time you're out of school, you're able to articulate the most abstract things. BUT HOW THE EFF DOES IT MATTER? anyway, we got into abstract art recently and I love any type of artistic medium that is NOT video. Fuck, why did I take this class in the first place? I think I thought it had to do with graphic design LOL. But noooo not at all, it's based on video art, even though most of the footage we watch in class are from major motion pictures. Anyway I worked really hard on our first video project and guess what? I GET AN A-. I look at everyone's grades and the majority of the class has an A. HOW THE FUCKKKKK?? Either our video wasn't that great or my group members wrote bad comments about me. I admit that what I did for the film did not directly affect it. Okay, I guess WRITING THE SCRIPT is a big part but we had to improvise so much of it. Still, our video was PHENOMENAL, way better than we expected. Our classmates were laughing so much when they watched it and one guy was like "THAT'S LEGIT." I really hope I can get the video so I can upload it or something.
so yeah, maybe my group mates said I didn't do much or didn't write much about what I did. FUCK. I did so much, though........it seemed like only a couple of us were taking the project seriously. I'd email my group members all the time but only one girl would reply. so yeah, I didn't edit, I didn't act, and I only filmed one scene but I tried so hard to build our film. We had like a very idea of what we wanted for the video and I tried to make sense of it...HENCE THE SCRIPT. As for my midterm paper, I went to my professor's office hours and I took four effing days to write it. AND I GOT A B. UGHHHHHHH So now I have like an average of a B+! Now that this class is actually going to count for my major (oh I'll talk about my new major and MINOR soon), I have to do well!!!!!!! I AM NOT SETTLING FOR ANYTHING LOWER THAN AN A-.
Okay sooooo I declared a major a while ago! Yep, I'm officially a Communication major. Good: I don't have many classes to take for Comm. Bad: I DON'T HAVE MANY CLASS TO TAKE FOR COMM. This is why Comm majors at SD are expected to minor and get internships. I'm really afraid that I'm not going to like Comm...I took Intro to Comm last quarter and I thought it was okay, but I didn't like it thaaat much.  But what else can I do if I want to get into print media?
So yeah, my minor. It just got approved on Wednesday...I'm an Art History minor! I really want to take more art history classes so I felt that I might as well minor in this subject I love. Back when I took Formations of Modern Art, I got a really good grade (A+!!!!!!!!!!) and I enjoyed the class, so I think this is something that I'm actually passionate about. | | |
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I kind of want to do this someday. Maybe during the next time I go to China, where it's actually accepted. ugh but my tuition seriously got JACKED UP, how will I ever be able to go on vacation now? I'm paying over $2000 more than what I usually pay just in ONE MONTH. EFF EFF EFF
will rant more later. I'm sooooo tired.
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I haven't been able to sleep very well at night lately, even if I only got four hours of sleep the previous night. And what's weirder is that I wake up earlier than I'm supposed to wake up. Like, everyday in the past week. I don't know if it's because I'm stressed or what.
Things I've got to do (SIGH)
-go to Ulta (my coupon expires today)
-meet up with Vis group to film
-read through classmates' stories
-watch an experimental movie for Ethnic Studies
-write a paper on that movie (by Wednesday)
-find semi-decent video art (by Thursday)
-read a couple of articles (by Thursday)
-PLAN A CLASS SCHEDULE FOR NEXT QUARTER
-FINISH THE LAYOUTS FOR HIGH SCHOOL CONFERENCE PROGRAMS
-NOT TO MENTION THE SHITLOAD OF WORK THAT'S DUE ON 10TH WEEK
fuuuuuuuck
I just want some free time. I hate carrying around this WEIGHT, just thinking about all the work I have to finish.
God I really can't wait for Thanksgiving.
Oh yeah I have to find out how am I gonna get home............................
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| My roommate starts drawing something and keeps asking me for colored highlighters, which I don't have.
"This is something we really shouldn't have forgotten?"
"What?"
She holds up a poster with our suitemate's name on it.
"Wait, what? I don't get it...is it her birthday or something?"
"Yeah"
"OH!...how did you find out?"
"I was talking to (insert suitemates' names here)"
"WHAT THE. Where have I been all this time?!?!? I'm like in another world right now"
"You really are...you're never around anymore!"
(loudly) "But it's not like I can do anything! How do I get all this work?!?!? I'm not even a science major!!!!!"
What I really wanted to say:
WELL
I HAVE OTHER PRIORITIES YOU KNOW
THAT'S WHY I CAN'T GET BACK TO OUR APARTMENT UNTIL 7PM
SHIT
YOU KNOW WHAT
YOU SHOULD BE DOING SOMETHING
NOT SLEEP 14 HOURS FOR THE ENTIRE HOLIDAY
YOU WOULDN'T SURVIVE WITH THE WORKLOAD I HAVE
AND I'M NOT EVEN A SCIENCE MAJOR LIKE YOUR PUSSY HUMAN DEVELOPMENT MAJOR
okay I probably wouldn't say that last part, and no offense to human development majors because y'all are cool
but my roomie needs to move her SNL-watching ass off the couch/chair/bed.
P.S. I watched a free screening of Jason Reitman's (director of Juno and Thank You for Smoking) new film Up in the Air featuring George Clooney. It left me really depressed and I got chills towards the end.......the main character was just so very lonely...felt a bit familiar.
Anyway I'm in the right mood for writing my super depressing sweatshop worker story. Seriously, at midnight, I was writing and when I thought of some dialogue and events to add, I got chills and I just wanted to stop typing. I couldn't really sleep well.
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